So we all remember watching that incredible movie, Armageddon, right? I remember I shed a tear when Bruce sacrificed himself for Ben (it’s not a spoiler because it wasn’t that good of a movie, especially when you watch it as an adult). But anyway, I thought that was the only way to stop an asteroid. As impending doom in the form of an asteroid the size of Texas threatens to destroy humanity as we know it, Billy Bob Thornton will be entrusted with the task of saving the world–makes complete sense up until this point. But who does he choose to save the planet? Maybe the best engineers in the world, combined with physicists well aware of the characteristics of outer space?
WRONG, idiot! They got a group of oil miners, because obviously they are the best equipped handle the rigours of doing their job in outer space. I mean, surviving in outer space and being responsible for all of Earth can be taught and trained; drilling, on the other hand, cannot. Billy Bob, a sucker for the dramatics, doesn’t choose just any group of oil miners. He picks an eclectic group of redneck, including a crazy cowboy Owen Wilson, a gentle giant Michael Clarke Duncan, and a suicidal Steve Buscemi. Yupp, that’s who I’d entrust with the world too.
Well, sorry Michael Bay, here is well-known and beloved actual scientist Bill Nye debunking your painfully logical idea. Instead of having a bunch of loveable misfits actually land on an incoming asteroid to drill a bomb into the centre so it’ll conveniently split into two pieces that bypass Earth, we can just use lasers. Friggen lasers, man.
Well, I hope they televise the laser show internationally, because I don’t want to miss a thing.